Australien Bewerbungsschreiben aus Englisch bewerten

Das Bewerbungsverfahren für Studienmöglichkeiten, Praktika und Jobs im Ausland unterscheidet sich von Land zu Land. Auf welche länderspezifischen Fallstricke besonders geachtet werden sollte, erfahrt ihr in dieser Rubrik.
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Laliluca
Beiträge: 1
Registriert: 12.09.2017, 12:37

Australien Bewerbungsschreiben aus Englisch bewerten

Beitrag von Laliluca » 12.09.2017, 12:43

Hallo ihr Lieben !

ich möchte bald nach Australien um zum einen das Lern zu erkunden und zum anderen mein Englisch aufzubessern.

Ich habe bereits einen Text geschrieben und wollte euch fragen ob ihr ein paar Verbesserungsvorschläge habt. Gerne auch Rechtschreibfehler oder Grammatikfehler korrigieren. Ich bin euch sehr dankbar für jeden Tipp und jede Hilfe.

Liebe Grüße



Dear host family,
My name is Marie, I’m 20 years old and live in an small village near cologne. I live there with my parents, my little sister (16), my grandparents and my dog. I have a very good relationship with my family. They try to support me whenever I have a problem.
I’m always helping my mother with the household chores. It is no problem for me to clean (I know that a toilet needs to be cleaned, too), hoover and go shopping. Sometimes I cook for my family but I must say I’m not the best cook but I’ willing to learn it.
The main reasons why I want to become an au pair is that first of all I like to be with children. I enjoy detecting the world with their perception. Kids are full of harmony, curiosity and pleasure.
Second I would get to know the Australian way of life and …..
The third reason is I want to improve my English. I’m not that good in this language and in my opinion it is so important to know and learn another language because otherwise you are limited in your own country. I also want to visit South America and learn Spanish.
I have my driving license for 2 ½ years now and I really love driving. I use my car every day and I haven’t had any accident yet. I’m a very careful driver.
In Germany it is my Job to take care of children. I work in some Kindergartens and primary schools as a nursey teacher (Erzieher? ) and I love to spend time and laugh with children.
In my leisure time I like meeting friends, being outside, doing sports or just relaxing. Sometime I play some card games with ma grandparents.
I’m a very spontaneous person and like to go out and get to know new things. Sports in which I’m very interested but I haven’t tried yet are surfing and snowboarding.
It is very important for me that people are honest, because I’m also honest. If there are any problems in my life or in the life of my friends, I try my best to handle them and to solve them as fast as possible.
My friends know me as a funny, helpful, reliable and open-minded person. One of the attribute that qualifies me for taking care of children is my sense of responsibility and also to know how being silly and crazy with the kids.

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TheGuide
Bewerbungshelfer
Beiträge: 11400
Registriert: 12.07.2013, 12:44

Beitrag von TheGuide » 12.09.2017, 12:50

Achte mal auf Groß- und Kleinschreibung. Und willst du wirklich vom Toilettenreinigen als nächsten Punkt direkt zum Kochen kommen? Ich sehe jetzt nicht, warum deine australische Gastfamilie Interesse daran haben sollte, dass du auch Ambitionen in Richtung Spanisch lernen in Lateinamerika hast.

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